Flowers For You
by jade
Summary: AU One-shot. Sometimes the soul needs to find another who can give it comfort, especially on days like these. Remember that these dreams are flowers for you.


I feel like I've been ignoring these two as of late. So I decided to write a V-day fic for them! Mostly because it would be funny. And because I love to torture Yaten! ^_^. It's so much fun. This is an AU folks!

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon. Or "Mad World" by Tears for Fears. That song RULES!!!

Warnings: Um, Yaten??? I dunno, there might be some swearing. Probably at Seiya. Heehee.

Flowers for You 

            _"I've never gotten flowers before."_

Why had she said that? 

            I suppose Seiya was the one who had brought it up. He had made a comment about how many flowers she would be getting for Valentine's Day from admirers. She had laughed a little, not smugly or humorlessly, but as if she genuinely thought it would be funny if she had received any.

            It made me jealous to think of some other guy buying her flowers and being the first one to give them to her. It made me jealous to think of admirers who could openly display their affection. 

            _"I've never gotten flowers before."_

Then it made me mad that no one had ever given her flowers. Why hadn't they noticed her? She was so beautiful, so smart, so kind…It was like she wasn't real. She couldn't be. So I captured her on film. I was really into photography so I had taken so many pictures of her and developed them and hid them all. It was childish and yet…

            I couldn't share her. 

            Even though she was friends with others, I was always there, giving out insults, hoping that they would go away so she would only look at me. Was that wrong? I don't know. I wish I could explain it all to her but I just…couldn't. Someone like her, someone special could only love another special person. I wasn't special at all. Maybe she'd fall in love today or tomorrow or on Valentine's Day and then I couldn't be with her all the time. 

            _I would just fade into the background…_

"Thinking deep thoughts?" Seiya interrupted my thoughts and I scowled slightly at him. "Like this?" And he put his face in his coffee mug and began to say 'deeeeeeep'. I ignored him. I didn't understand what Kakyuu saw in him. 

            "Seiya, please, take into account your age." Taiki adjusted his glasses. Thank the gods for Taiki who could make Seiya knock it off once and awhile. 

            "Oh, Hotaru's home." Seiya looked out the window. I immediately looked up. Her bedroom lights weren't on. I say lights because Hotaru didn't have one main lighting fixture but lots of lamps. She loved lamps. She said they brightened her day, like little fireflies in the darkness. She always said funny things like that. "Haha! Gotcha'!" I threw an apple at him, successfully pegging him. 

            "I'm reading you two." Taiki reminded us. That was the problem with Taiki; he wasn't always around because he had his nose stuck in a book so often. He said he read to escape the harshness of reality. 

            _"Can you do that? Just escape the harshness of reality?"_

_            "I think the harshness puts everything into perspective." _

That's what she had said. I glanced back up at Hotaru's window, still not home. 

            "Konnichiwa!" Kakyuu and Hotaru came bursting through the front door. Kakyuu and Hotaru were very close friends, mostly because Hotaru didn't have many friends. Hotaru lived with her dad, who wasn't around much, so he also had her three rather loony aunts living with them. There was Setsuna, who always knew precisely what time it was even though she never wore a watch, Michiru, who played the violin and came the closest to normal, and then Haruka, her rather scary over-protective aunt. Technically, Michiru wasn't related to Hotaru, but was living with Haruka. 

            "Hello!" Seiya bounced up towards his girlfriend. "You're looking wonderful today."

            "Of course we are." Kakyuu hugged him. "Valentine's Day is right around the corner and we went around buying presents."

            "Presents?" Seiya grinned. "You bought me chocolate didn't you?"

            "Who said I bought anything for you?" Kakyuu teased him. Hotaru was smiling at the two and their antics. I tried to think of a way to draw her attention towards me. 

            "I hope you didn't get anything for The Grinch Who Stole Valentine's Day." Seiya looked pointedly at me. I glared back. 

            "Valentine's Day is stupid anyways." I folded my arms. "It's just a stupid tradition and all it does is make couples really annoying and up the suicide rates."

            "How very romantic." Kakyuu rolled her eyes at me. "Seriously, I'm beginning to agree with Seiya." 

            "I think Valentine's Day is nice." Hotaru looked at me with a thoughtful expression. "Because you get to see people so happy to be in love." 

            _Love isn't always happy…_

_            Especially if the other person could never love you back._

"Whatever." I shrugged. "What are you guys doing over here anyways?"

            "We thought we'd visit." Kakyuu defended. "Besides, we live so close to each other." Seiya, Taiki, and I, who were all cousins, lived together after our families died in a horrible fire during a family reunion. Next to our huge house was the Tomoe mansion, and on the other side of that was the Kinmoku mansion. 

            "We can leave if we're troubling you." Hotaru offered politely. 

            "That's not what I meant." I looked at her unsurely. "I was just freaking curious." 

            "So, Hotaru, do you have a valentine?" Seiya asked. I went rigid. I did not want to hear the answer to this question. I saw Kakyuu send a knowing look towards Hotaru. What did _that _mean? 

            "Uh…" Hotaru went pink and began to stammer. "Um…" 

            "It's Hotaru's business if she has a valentine and no one else's." Kakyuu answered for her. 

            "I've got to drop this stuff off." Hotaru held up a bag. "I told Setsuna I'd check in at six." 

            "I'll go with you." I told her, ignoring snickering from Seiya. 

            "Okay." Hotaru sent a bright smile my way. I loved it when she smiled at me like that. I went with her, after grabbing my coat; we trudged along the snow-covered sidewalk towards her house. I looked up at the snowflakes that were swirling down from the heavens. 

            _"It's like…ah, I don't know. It's like you're watching little fairies dance down to the ground…little white snow fairies…"_

We went inside and the three aunts were having tea in the front room. They all looked up at us. 

            "It's six-oh-one." Haruka pointed at her watch.

            "It's six." Setsuna stated. 

            "It is not, look at my watch." Haruka showed the tall green-haired woman her watch. 

            "It's fast." Setsuna did not seem fazed at all. "Hotaru's right on time." 

            "Besides, how many times in your life did you make it home when you said you'd be home?" Michiru teased Haruka. "I think you're purposely ten minutes late."

            "Hey, like they say, 'fashionably late.'" Haruka grinned back at Michiru. Then she seemed to spot me behind Hotaru. "What are _you _doing here?" 

            "Haruka!" Hotaru's brow furrowed. "It's just Yaten!" 

            _That's right, it's just Yaten._

_            Just Yaten._

_            No one important._

"Uh huh." Haruka glared at me. I glared back. 

            "Should we start dinner?" Michiru asked the other two.

            "Let's wait another 55 minutes, that way Hotaru has some time to visit with her friend." Setsuna suggested.

            "Fifty-five minutes with that guy?!" Haruka stood up and slammed her hands on the table. Michiru made a secret shooing gesture towards us and went to calm Haruka down. 

            What a bunch of loonies. 

            Hotaru led me upstairs, passed the open door of the music room. We spent a lot of time in her music room. Mostly because Seiya was _always _hogging the piano over at our house and besides Hotaru's house was quieter. Hotaru knew how to play the flute, the piano, and the violin. I could only play the piano and according to Hotaru, sing. I didn't think I was very good at that.

            Then we turned into Hotaru's room. She turned on all her lamps with a special dimmer switch so that they didn't flood the whole room with bright light, but instead really did look like little fireflies that glowed in the darkness. She opened her curtains and was watching the falling snow. I stood next to her. 

            "So…" A question nagged at me. "Do you have a valentine?" I saw her blush again. 

            "No one's asked." Hotaru replied. 

            "Oh." I wanted to keep it that way. No one was going to ask her; at least, no one would if it was up to me. "I was just wondering…" 

            "I'm sure you'll have lots of girls asking." Hotaru turned towards me with a cheerful smile. "That must be nice." 

            "I don't care about that sort of thing." I told her. "Sometimes you don't want to be asked by lots of people, just one." 

            "Just one…" Hotaru gazed out the window, almost sadly. "Just one…" 

            _"I've never gotten flowers before."_

I watched her as the snowflakes danced in front of her. She loved snow. Winter was her favorite season. She loved to watch the snow cover up everything. 

            _"Everything's dead during the winter…but the snow covers it and makes it all beautiful. You don't mind so much that there aren't any flowers…"_

Haruka came up there a few minutes later, trying to be casual about it and asked what we were up to (still trying to be casual). Eventually, I went home, thinking about her and my own words.

            _Just one._

_            If she could ask me…_

----------------------

            The next day, the day before Valentine's Day, Seiya had left to go do something with Kakyuu and Taiki was at the library. So I went up to our music room and sat at the piano. I began to play a couple of notes, just enjoying the feel of cool ivory under my fingers. 

            Then I began to play the piano and sing along. No one was around and that's how I liked it. I could get lost in my own world. My fingers danced as I sang. 

_"All around me are familiar faces,  
Worn out places, worn out faces,  
Bright and early for their daily races,  
Going nowhere, going nowhere,  
And their tears are filling up their glasses,  
No expression, no expression,_

_Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow,   
No tomorrow, no tomorrow,  
"And I find it kind of funny,  
I find it kind of sad,  
The dreams in which I'm dying,  
Are the best I've ever had,  
"I find it hard to tell you,  
'Cause I find it hard to take,   
When people run in circles,   
It's a very, very mad world,  
"Children waiting for the day they feel good,  
Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday,  
Made to feel the way that every child should,  
Sit and listen, sit and listen,  
Went to school and I was very nervous,  
No one knew me, no one knew me,  
Hello teacher tell me what's my lesson,  
Look right through me, look right through me,_

_"And I find it kind of funny,  
I find it kind of sad,  
The dreams in which I'm dying,  
Are the best I've ever had,  
"I find it hard to tell you,  
'Cause I find it hard to take,   
When people run in circles,   
It's a very, very mad world."_

            Then I heard a slight movement behind me. I froze and turned around. Hotaru was standing there, watching me wide-eyed. I just couldn't move. I was waiting for her to say something. She had heard me sing before, but never that song. 

            "It was so beautiful…" Hotaru's hand suddenly went to the corner of her eye and it was then that I realized she was crying. "It was so sad…" 

            "Why are you crying?" I asked her seriously.

            "I just…I don't know." Hotaru shook her head. "I heard that song once, when I was younger…I thought it was very sad then but somehow, when you sang it, it made me want to cry." 

            "Was it that bad?" I frowned a little. 

            "No, it was…I wish I could play like that." Hotaru told me. Which was weird. Hotaru had been playing since she was five. I had been playing since I was ten. She had a five year advantage on me. "You played it so well, it was like you were trying to tell anyone who heard it how you feel." 

            "I have the music for it." I offered her. She blinked in surprise. "If you want to learn how to play it. It's not that hard." 

            "I would like to learn it." Hotaru smiled gratefully at me. It was as if I had done the kindest thing in the world just by giving her a few sheets of music. 

            "When you learn it, you can sing it for me." I became embarrassed at saying something like that. I felt my face grow hot. "You don't have to." 

            "I will." Hotaru promised. 

            _"I'm not much of a singer…you would hate it if I did…"_

_            Will you actually sing for me? _

_            You never have before? _

_            Or will you sing to someone else?_

-------------------

            Valentine's Day. 

            I was dreading this but it was going to happen. I got up and quickly got ready for school. Downstairs there was red confetti everywhere, and even, unfortunately on the breakfast that Kakyuu had come over early to make. There was hearts up everywhere. She had apparently decided we needed some holiday cheer. Plus she wanted to surprise Seiya who she ended up having to drag out of bed. It was nice. 

            I opened the door to leave and saw Hotaru leaving her house, calling out good-byes to the aunts. She was wearing a long black coat over her usual black clothes and a black beret that concealed her bangs. Her lavender eyes sparkling, she hefted her bag and saw me. My eyes widened. She was so beautiful. I didn't have a camera to capture this moment. I wanted it desperately so I could never forget it. 

            I went back inside and shut the door. I wasn't ready to talk to her yet. 

            What did I want? What could I do? I opened the door and came face to face with her, apparently she was about to knock on the door. 

            "Good morning Yaten. Are you guys ready to go to school?" Hotaru asked, her head leaning to one side a little. 

            "I'm ready; the others are still getting ready. Do you want to just go?" I didn't want to share her with anyone right then. I wanted to walk along with her, while it lightly snowed. 

            "Okay." Hotaru agreed. We walked along together, not really speaking. I watched her face, until she noticed me and then she blushed a little. "What is it?" 

            "Nothing." I shook my head. Then she stopped. "Is something wrong?"

            "Um…not really." Hotaru looked down at her feet. "Do you want to come over today after school? I'll meet you at my house…but you don't have to come if you don't want to." 

            "Huh?" I was surprised by this. Why did she look so nervous? "If you want." She looked so sad and I couldn't figure it out. Why was she sad?

            "Arigotou." Hotaru's shoulders dropped as she continued to look down. "Arigotou Yaten."

            I didn't understand what she was thanking me for. 

            "Thank you for what?" My brow furrowed as I tried to figure her out. What was she trying to say to me? 

            "Thanks for being my friend." Hotaru told me. 

            "What's wrong?" I questioned her more aggressively. "Come on, Hotaru, why are you so upset?" 

            "I don't want you to hate me." Hotaru told me, looking up into my green eyes. There were tears in her eyes. "Please, no matter, what…don't hate me…"

            "I won't hate you." I vowed. "I'll never hate you because…" 

            "Why?" Hotaru had this beautiful light in her eyes. She needed reassurance? Why? Why? Why did she ask why? I would answer her and maybe she knew that.

            "I love you." 

            All I heard was her gasp and I ran. I didn't want to hear her reject me. I didn't want to hear her sympathy or pity. I didn't want to hear any of it. I heard her call my name, I knew that running was cowardly, not only because it was running from what she had to say, but also because I knew Hotaru was asthmatic and had never been much of a runner. It was cruel. 

            _Now you know…you know all about me…_

I made myself scarce that day at school. I made sure not to run into her in the halls. Kakyuu kept asking me what I did. I just ignored her. Seiya kept asking me questions as well. I didn't want to talk to any of them. 

            After school I knew I had to see her again. Even if just to hear her tell me there was no such thing as fireflies loving men. 

            _"I've never gotten flowers before…"_

I would be the first. Even if she hated me. I bought a bouquet of roses, the cliché almost killing me, but then, I didn't mind. She might like them; she could say her first flowers were from a boy who wanted to shower her with roses. 

            The walk to her house was so long. I forced myself on and when I arrived, I rang the doorbell. The door opened. At first I thought it had opened on its own. But then Setsuna peered creepily out from behind it. 

            "Right on time." She told me eerily. I gulped and started to go towards the stairs. And then I heard it. It was faint. She wasn't very loud when she sang; I didn't expect her to be. But it was a beautiful sound.

_"And their tears are filling up their glasses,  
No expression, no expression,_

_Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow,   
No tomorrow, no tomorrow,"_

My mouth went dry as I climbed the stairs steadily. Why was she singing for me? Why was she singing that song for me? Or was she singing it for someone else? Who knew she could get the song so fast? Or had she practiced since I gave it to her?

_"And I find it kind of funny,  
I find it kind of sad,  
The dreams in which I'm dying,  
Are the best I've ever had,  
"I find it hard to tell you,  
'Cause I find it hard to take,   
When people run in circles,   
It's a very, very mad world,"_

I opened the door. Her eyes were closed as she played at the piano and sang. No one else was there. She was singing it just for me. I listened to her sing. Not making a sound until the end. Her eyes opened and she focused on me.

            "We went shopping, Kakyuu and I…" Hotaru began to tell me. "She asked if I was going to get anything for you but I couldn't find anything. I couldn't find a present that I thought you would like. So that was my present, though, you look like you got valentine presents already." She looked at the bouquet. Didn't she realize?

            "These flowers are for you." I held out the bouquet towards her. "You said you had never gotten flowers before…I thought…maybe you'd like some, even if they were from me." 

            "I love them because they're from you." She accepted the bouquet. I stared at her in disbelief. She put them down on the piano. "Didn't you know? I'm in love with you." I wrapped my arms tightly around her, pressing her against me. 

            _"Didn't you know?"_

_            "Didn't you know?"_

_            I didn't know…if you hadn't asked…I never would have. _

And from then on, I had more beautiful memories of her. 

            _"Love is like fireflies…they glow brightly, not knowing when they'll die but happy that they can light up the darkness for that moment…"_

-------------------------

            Omigod, I had set out to write like a humorous sort of story about Yaten and Hotaru on Valentine's Day and it ended up being really sad. -_-, I almost started crying. It probably didn't help that the online radio station I'm listening to is playing nothing but sad music. Well, some of it's upbeat but damn. Yeah. I hope you guys enjoyed this! It's dedicated to all those who've never gotten flowers. ^_^. Remember that you will someday. 


End file.
